In a world where relationships have never been more publicized, there is a form of betrayal that doesn’t include any physical cheating but hurts just as much. That betrayal is emotional cheating. It happens when either of the parties develops a strong emotional bond with a third party who is not part of the relationship in a way that compromises intimacy, trust or transparency.
Although this relationship might seem fine on the surface, it can destroy emotions, create distance which often leads to endless conflict. This blog will define the concept of emotional cheating, distinguish between it and a close friendship, and provide us with some ways to figure out the signs.
Part 1: What Is Emotional Cheating?
Emotional cheating is infidelity that involves having an emotional attachment with another person besides your long time partner. It means sharing deep thoughts, emotions, weaknesses, or even desires to someone other than your partner. You could share your dreams or fears with this other person, talk about your partner, or even make comparisons between the two. In the long run it leads to emotional rivalry between that outside relationship and the relationship you share with your partner.
This is not just friendship. The difference lies in the boundaries. A friendship helps to maintain your current relationship; emotional infidelity destroys it. It often involves secrecy, hiding aspects of the relationship, or feeling guilty about interactions. It can even be fantasizing about this other individual, communicating with them as a priority or even thinking that they know you better than your partner.
This is sometimes also called an emotional affair cheating, since the relationship is similar to an affair but doesn’t involve physical intimacy, but it can be just as damaging. The emotional strength, time and focus invested in another person, slowly vanishes what you have to give to your partner. This form of cheating has been treated as a form of betrayal since it goes against the implicit or explicit promise of emotional exclusivity in the relationship.
However, the causes can vary. These may be either unmet emotional needs, absence of intimacy, communication problems, loneliness, or even the possibility of emotional intimacy happening accidentally (such as a colleague or friend who will listen when your partner is not around).
Part 2: Emotional Cheating vs a Closer Friendship
Since emotional betrayal usually begins as friendship, the differences should be known. Some of the differences between them are as follows:
These differences make you notice when your blossoming friendship has crossed the boundary. A closer friendship may also have certain emotional aspects without cheating. However, when regular patterns of secrecy, emotional prioritisation, and boundary erosion occur, then emotional infidelity must have started.
Part 3: Signs Your Partner Is Emotionally Cheating on You
Recognizing emotional cheating early on can help a relationship either fix issues before they are deep, or allow you to make wise decisions. The following are some of the emotional cheating signs to observe:
They have more in common with someone other than you
When your partner discloses to a third party their concerns, fears and desires, things they do not express to you, then it is a possible sign that emotional intimacy has shifted.
Constant contact during unusual working hours
Late messages or calls in the night or at the time that you normally expect it to be doing something different, and particularly when they are secret or private.
Prioritizing that other connection
They can give you a call off so they can chat with that other individual, or appear thrilled when they are communicating with that other person. You might also notice they check in with them often.
Defensiveness or secrecy about that person
When you inquire about whom they are communicating or about what they communicate, they avoid the question or brush away concerns. They may hide messages or lie about the frequency they communicate with that person.
Emotional distance with you
Less concern with your everyday life, less togetherness in good times or hard times, less physical or verbal love. The emotional attachment gets weaker.
Comparisons that favor the other person
You hear words such as, they just get me, they understand me or I wish you were a little like them. These comparisons signal psychological cheating.
Preoccupation or daydreaming about them
They may often ponder over their interactions with such an individual, have recollections, fantasize. Even when with you, their mind wanders over that person.
Reduced intimacy with you
When there’s lack of emotional or physical closeness, decreased communication, intimacy, and affection. The partner appears to distance himself.
Feeling guilty or hiding things
When confronted, they might say that they are just friends yet there is something wrong about it. Hiding or omitting is the sign in itself.
Part 4: How to Tell If Your Spouse Is Emotionally Cheating on WhatsApp?
WhatsApp lets people talk anytime, but constant chatting can sometimes cross boundaries in a relationship. When conversations become secret or too frequent, this can be of concern. In these instances, people resort to programs such as iToolab WaTracker to maintain a check on their partner’s WA activity.
iToolab WaTracker helps in tracking the online activity of a specific contact on WhatsApp, such as last seen and online status updates. It sends immediate notifications, shows in-depth activity logs, and does not need to have physical access to the other device.
Main Features
- Check any contact’s Last Seen without them knowing
- Get instant online and offline alerts
- View simple reports of WhatsApp activity
- Compare contacts’ activity times to see if they match
Here are the steps to set up iToolab WaTracker and check the WhatsApp activities of your spouse.
Step 1 Free download, install and open iToolab WaTracker. On the main interface select the “+ Add a contact”. Add the name of the person, his/her phone number, and country/region.
Step 2 When it appears, press the “Connect WhatsApp” button when shown. It takes two steps to connect your account with WaTracker – the WhatsApp online tracking app, as indicated on the screen.
Step 3 Once done, press the “activation” button to start tracking the WhatsApp status. Then you can see the online/offline status, Last Seen, and online duration.
Conclusion
Emotional cheating is a big violation of trust in a relationship. It is not characterized by physical action but by emotional intimacy, secrecy, and attachment to another person outside your first relationship. Hiding communication, putting your partner down, and giving preference to a different emotional attachment are signs that may point to emotional infidelity being committed.
Apps such as iToolab WaTracker may help in exposing the behavioral patterns in WhatsApp, but they do not replace honest conversation or professional help. If left unchecked, emotional betrayal may destroy relationships which were based on love and trust. However, emotional cheating can be avoided and its effects can be repaired with the help of awareness, clear boundaries, and open communication.